The top Life Coaches and personal development gurus do this…


I’ve been loving that Super Soul with Oprah is now a Podcast! Listening to the best in the business share their experiences and wisdom while going about my day is one of my favourite things to do. 

Listening to Tony Robbins, Life Coach extraordinare, and Iyanla Vanzant, creator of The TV show Fix My Life and incredible speaker, they both focused on the same practice at the core of spiritual growth and living in alignment with your true purpose…connecting with your heart (your intuition, God, the universe). One of my mentors, Sonia Tully, has taught me a very similar practice that I use all the time to get guidance and I love it because it’s quick, easy and so clear. 

Tony describes choosing something in your life that you’re struggling with at a level of 7 out of 10. Closing your eyes and putting your hand on your heart and bringing to mind 3 separate experiences you are grateful for e.g. The birth of your child, achieving a goal or a special time with friends. Then once you’ve got yourself into the state (vibration) of gratitude you ask your heart what to do about the problem you are facing and listen for the guidance. 

Iyanla talks about being in the God space in prayer, feeling completely connected and at one with creation. She emphasises that your intuition is key to the choices you make and is how we receive guidance from God. Oprah says if you’re out of alignment with your higher purpose God hits you first with a pebble, then if you don’t listen the rock gets bigger and bigger until it’s a boulder. This is a metaphor for the intuitive nudges we get that we ignore, for example if you bring on a new business partner you may have some misgivings but ignore them. Then a few things start to go wrong in your business, but you soldier on. Eventually the business may fail and you go bankrupt (the boulder!). This is not a punishment from God or the universe, it’s purely because that situation or relationship, in the form it’s in, it’s untenable for you and out of alignment with your deepest desires. So eventually it has to break down completely if you don’t listen and act on the red flags. 

Sonia, my mentor, teaches a beautiful tool called ‘My heads says….and my heart says….’ Choose something your worried about or struggling with, then speak out loud ‘my head says….’ and say all the thoughts and stuff your head is saying to you e.g. I’m not sure I can do this, am I good enough? What will they say? Etc. Then take a deep breath, put your hand on your heart and tune in – then say ‘my heart says…’ and allow the words to come naturally. Can you feel the difference in energy of your head and your heart? What do they both feel like? 

I love that there is so much emphasis on how essential it is to connect to your heart and your intuition. That is the space we create from and heal in. 

Sending love ❤️ 

Image credit: upliftconnect.com 

How do you connect to your intuition? 

My first experience of actively connecting with my intuition was using a very practical tool – oracle cards. I started using Angel oracle cards created by Doreen Virtue; there are so many different card decks out there for you to choose from. I loved this tool because I could hold the cards in my hands, there was a guidebook with instructions & explanations. It was practical rather than conceptual. I would pull cards to answer all kind of questions and use the guidebook, in conjunction with my intuition, to interpret the message. There are even apps you can download onto your phone now.  

How you start to interpret messages is by reading words on the cards, looking up each card in the guideboook and asking yourself what the images mean to you. Bring your awareness to your thoughts, feelings, ideas and visualisations to piece together the guidance that comes through. There is lots to learn about card readings, I completed an Angel Tarot Card Reader training which was fab, but you certainly don’t need to have heaps of training to use this tool to connect to your intuition.

At first it can feel very uncomfortable trying to figure out ‘what’s my intuition & what’s my mind or my imagination’? Which is why it’s recommended to start by asking questions or seeking guidance on subjects that not too heavily emotionally laden. For example – what do you suggest I focus on today? Rather than will my current relationship last? 

The gut feeling. We’ve all used the phrase – I have a gut feeling about this; meaning I have a feeling in my body, specifically in the tummy area, that is giving me information on this subject that I can’t verify externally. This is most often your intuition. I like to use my ‘gut feeling’ to help me with a yes or no answer. I pose my yes or no question and bring my attention to the sensation to my tummy. For me a yes feels like a lifting and lightening of the energy around my middle, whereas a no is more of a sinking, lowering feeling in my tummy. Test it out with questions you know the answer to and see what a yes and no feels like to you in your body. For example my name is….say the wrong name to get a no & the right name to get a yes. 

Another tool I use almost everyday is a little more subtle and may take a bit more practice, so don’t feel disheartened if it doesn’t feel clear straight away. Before I go sleep at night, when I’m in bed with my eyes closed, I thank my intellect for all the hard work it’s done during the day and suggest it has a break. I feel like my prefrontal cortex (the front part of my brain) is almost moving back a little into my skull – I’m sure it isn’t, it’s more my visualisation. Giving my intellect the back seat allows space for my higher self, my intuition, my angels and guides to come in. If you’re not comfortable with the words angels or guides just think of it as your inner guidance system. 

You might feel a shift in energy, more subtle and peaceful, like a safe space. From here I communicate with my thoughts and ‘listen’ for answers. There are a number of different ways we can perceive intuitive guidance; clairaudience is the ‘hearing’ of guidance. This usually doesn’t mean an external sound, like the sound of others talking, but rather an internal perception of words. It is similar to thoughts but it has a very different quality to it. I find thoughts usually have lots and lots of words, they run quite fast and feel almost energetically jaggedy. Whereas my intuitive guidance has few words, is very clear and comes in quickly and has an energetic quality like clear glass. So if thoughts feel like the opaque glass you have in bathrooms, guidance feels like completely clear glass. I know that sounds pretty abstract! Give it a try and see how it feels to you, remembering not to put too much pressure on yourself and start with simple, unemotional requests. 

Let me know how you get on! 😘

The Power of Ritual (warning: my soul laid bare)

Last year I was trying to get over my marriage ending, find some resolution, understanding and move on. It’s a process. One particular day I felt very strongly guided to do a ritual for the ending of the my marriage. Funnily enough it was also 4th July, Independence Day for all my American friends. (There was no forward planning on that one.)

This is the spot that I chose, near my home in London, right by the river in a beautiful and private place.

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I wore my rings for the last time while I sat by the river feeling all the waves of emotions that were coursing through me.

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I took a copy of my marriage certificate with me (you need the real one for the divorce – which takes 2 years…so a copy was the practical option). I burnt it as a symbol of the of the ending. There was no malice involved, more of a ‘dust to dust, ashes to ashes’ type mourning vibe.

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It felt important to write a message from my soul to his on the last little piece of the certificate. Words that I couldn’t say to him in person because he would probably think I was a crazy person. I was in floods of tears as the emotions spilled out of me. At this point I should probably add, in the name of authenticity, that I also had a bottle of Prosecco and packet of cigarettes with me.

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Once I had finished saying my goodbyes I rolled the little note into my ring and prepared to throw it in the water. I said so many prayers for him and for me, that the pain would ease, that life would be bright again, that there was some point to all this.

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I threw it in the water and watched it slowly sink. So much beauty and meaning in the middle of so much pain.

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After I was all cried out and a bottle of Prosecco down I decided to go out, by myself, to celebrate the 4th of July. So I did. I went to an event in central London and met some great people and had a fun and crazy night.

It was interesting that I completely followed my intuition to do the ritual, I hadn’t read any suggestions online, I just did what I felt. And it struck me that so many rituals in life involve earth, fire and water. We are baptised in water and cremated in fire or buried in death. I was inexplicably drawn to sit down on the earth, burn my marriage certificate and throw my ring and final love note to my husband in the water. Life and death. Cleansing and detoxifying. Grounding and yet overwhelmingly emotional.

The ending of the story is not ‘and then I was fine and healed and life just got better and better’. No. It was a very special, painful, emotional, deeply loving part of the process. It created more love and acceptance and that is really all we need.

With so much love, Gemma xx

Do you believe in angels? 


I was listening to Sonia Choquette, one of my favourite teachers, on Hay House radio today and she was talking about experiences with angels. Have you ever had an interaction or experience that felt heaven sent? Something or someone showed up just at the right time or said just the right thing? I want to share the most poignant angelic experience I’ve had. 

It was a couple of years ago and I didn’t realise it at the time but I was on the very verge of an emotional breakdown. I was in the midst of the early stages of separation from my husband and feeling so much pain and loss. I was alone at a huge summer event with thousands of people, I had arrived before my family, who I was meeting there. I was just holding on by a thread and had spent the earlier part of that day driving to the event, chain smoking and drinking just enough beer to numb out a little but not so much I couldn’t drive. Yep it was bad. 

So I get there by myself and it’s so overwhelming. I was standing in a short queue to get my ticket and find out where to park. There was a man and his teenage son standing behind me. The man said a friendly ‘hello’ – the absolute last thing I wanted was to talk to anyone! So I tried to mumble a reply and shut down the conversation. He kept on talking to me until eventually I couldn’t avoid eye contact anymore. When he looked at me he immediately he said ‘are you ok?’ looking very concerned. I couldn’t hold it in anymore so I started crying and told him I wasn’t ok at all. 

He took me to the side with his son and asked me what was wrong. I explained my husband’s father had recently died and the following months had been chaos and disaster leading up to my leaving my home and my husband. I told him I was a mess and all I wanted was to work out my marriage but my husband didn’t want to. By this time I was full on weeping so he held me then he told me he was a pastor and had a lot of experience with death and loss and would I be open to hearing some of his thoughts? 

I said yes, he was so warm and wise and comforting. He explained to me what the death of a father can do to a relatively young man and he assured me that it wasn’t because of me that my husband didn’t want to work on our marriage. It was his own experience and feelings that he was facing. That it was totally understandable for me to completely blame myself, because that’s what we do when something bad happens to us, we take on the blame. I won’t go into all the details as it’s not just my story, it’s my husbands too, and I don’t have permission to share. 

Pastor Jeremy in that moment was my angel sent from God to hold me and talk to me when I was all alone and broken. I wrote down his words and re-read them nearly everyday in the following months for comfort. I remember after that meeting I sat in my car waiting for my family and in the middle of all the mess and pain I felt so blessed. I knew God was there for me and he had sent one of his angels to take care of me. His words still mean so much to me, I will never forget those moments. 

So yes I do believe wholeheartedly in angels and I’m so grateful to be connected to them, not just in the most extreme times but day-to-day too. Finding a feather or a penny to me are signs my angels are with me. 

If you have an angel experience to share I’d love to hear it. Sending you love ❤️ 
Photo credit: Pinterest 

Sadness at the end of a Netflix series 

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Yes I’m being serious!! Have you ever felt that sadness and missing of the characters in a series that really touched your heart and, more often than not, was a welcome escape from being present to whatever’s happening in your life at the time?

I remember when my father in law died my husband asked me stay at home rather than join him to be with his family. I was alone and having not experienced the death of a parent was overwhelmed and emotional. The wonderful series Nashville was there for me, along with red wine and cigarettes (they were roll ups which don’t really count..). It was inspiring, dramatic and I fell for the characters.

This time it’s Friday Night Lights, the very special small town, American football show. Interestingly they both star Connie Britton who is sweet, stunning and an independent, inspiring woman in both.

The marriage of the football coach and his wife (Connie Britton) filled me with hope for myself and sadness at the failure of my marriage experience so far. They were both inspiring leaders in their community, they compromised and were incredibly honest all the time. They loved each other and still had the spark as well as being incredible parents, leading by example.

This time the series helped my through the reality of slowly recovering from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and the process of trying to let go of my marriage. My hopes and dreams are intertwined in the story line and characters, as well as sadness when a sweet moment reminds me of a not so sweet time in my life. I want a marriage like Coach & Connie. In the last episode an ex football quarterback asks Coach for his daughter’s hand in marriage…it took so much for the poor guy to build up the courage. It made me think how could my ex husband have gone through all the steps of getting married, including asking my Dad and promising to take care of me forever, to throw it all away?

I think these stories and characters come along at just the right time…to give us hope in love, in life, in dreams and in the future. Messages from our angels and spirit guides maybe?

This time I’ve been accompanied by a bottle or two of craft beer and my vape (e-cigarette) which I think is progress 😄

When you have absolutely no idea what is going to happen next and everything you thought was your life has fallen apart…

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Whether all is well, there is some discomfort or life feels like it’s coming crashing down simple spiritual tools can offer so much support, comfort and guidance.

This image was taken at the very worst time in my life, I was recently separated from my husband, I had moved out of my home and was staying with my Mum, I very suddenly left my job and was experiencing an emotional breakdown including anxiety attacks. My whole world was crashing down.

I found great solace and hope in connecting to my spiritual self, to God (whatever that may be to you – nature, the Universe etc). I found quieting my mind and practicing listening prayer with my head on my pillow as I was going to sleep was how I could tune into guidance and support from God and my angels. The process involves asking a question to your higher self/God, maybe just ‘what would you like me to know?’ And listening quietly for the answer to come to you. Listen with your heart rather than your head. Don’t worry if the answer doesn’t make sense or your hear nothing, gently does it. 

I craved to know more and so learned about other tools that offered this connection and support. Crystals are thought of as beings in their own right and can offer divination, healing and protection. There are many, many different types and colours which tend to have different properties and help us to bring in certain energies – for example I spent a lot of time with rose quartz and obsidian during this time. Rose quartz is the stone of love – in my case I was focusing on self love and healing. Obsidian is a strong protective stone helping me to feel I was taken care of even when negative and damaging energies were present. Using crystals can be as simple as placing one or two by your bed as your sleep, wearing them as jewellery or my personal favourite is popping them in your pocket and/or bra. Don’t forget to cleanse your crystals regularly. 

Angel cards and angel tarot cards were introduced to me around this time by my cousin and I found the messages so hopeful and comforting. I threw myself into learning all I could about angel tarot cards and am now a Certified Angel Tarot Card Reader using my cards every day for myself and others. When you have absolutely no idea what is going to happen next and everything you thought was your life has fallen apart, gaining insight from the angels, and my own intuition, was a life line to a yet unseen future with hope, possibility and happiness.

 

 

What to do when you don’t know what to do

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Today I had a situation which seemed like a lose-lose kinda situation – I was in a catch 22 and which ever way I went would be difficult. I felt stressed, emotional and I was trying to work out what the best move was in my head which was exhausting and unhelpful. I reached out to family and friends who were all supportive but they all had their own ideas which were all different – confusing!

Finally after stressing, crying, talking and worrying I decided I was getting nowhere. So I gave myself some space, calmed down and took a few breaths and remembered another way to approach it – through my spirit, through God and the Angels and my guides. I use Angel tarot cards to access guidance so I grabbed my phone and downloaded the app (I didn’t have my deck of cards on me). I prayed and asked a very simple ‘yes or no’ question – should I stay? The answer was a resounding yes!! It reminded me that I had consulted the cards when I was making a very similar decision recently and again the answer was clear and I followed the guidance. To be honest in both cases to my mind and my emotions the option of staying seemed like the most challenging and uncomfortable one.

I took the reading a little further and did a 5 card reading going into the situation in more depth. Again the cards were clear that I should stay. I felt very strongly that there is a reason I need to stay that is utterly invisible to me now, but I’m sure will become clear in time. God, the universe, the Angels have the BIG picture when our minds have a minuscule perspective. All of a sudden rather than questioning myself on whether I’m crazy for making important life decisions based on a few cards with pictures and words on them, it seemed crazy to try and work out what the best solution is from my tiny view point.

I felt such a sense of calm and peace at this realisation and there and the made my choice in full faith that I’m being guided by something far greater, that I can trust and let go of control. What a relief!

I highly recommend you try it – http://www.angeltherapy.com – Doreen Virtue’s website has a free oracle card section which is exactly where I started.

With love xx